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just thoughts

letting God be huge, wise, and in control

I had a friend recently write me about some really honest questions he was wrestling with – such as, “In my heart things are stirring…but is it me or is it God… wondering sometimes if I have missed it completely…makes me wonder what my life is about right now, and if the hunger I feel is true or what…”
I was encouraged by the raw honesty of this.  I too have had been doing some soul searching over the last 18 months.  It’s being a time of re-evaluating:  what I believe God is speaking to me about the direction and investment of my time, energy and resources.  Re-evaluating my skills (and lack thereof) in the work place – albeit, this came in the midst of probably the most challenging season of my adult working years in terms of the requirements placed on my time and the need to “step into bigger shoes.”  I’ve been confronted with a more honest assessment of the limits of my love for others vs. myself.  And during this same time period I’ve been very quiet on this blog.  There’s been less time for it, and I got out of a writing pattern.  But it’s more than that.  I think I’m slowly getting a new grip on what my life is really about, like my friend wrote.   I wrote back to him:
Dear Friend,
I commend you for the courage to ask the hard questions, and to look at things squarely.
The Lord once gave me a thought about this, when living in southern cal, and thinking about how we naturally bop around in the surf on the beach to avoid the impact of waves so they wouldn’t knock you down.  We jump up, dive, turning our bodies to the side and lean into the waves – of course!  We want to stay upright, on our feet.  He was showing me how I was approaching life, and he wanted to show me a different way.  He wanted me to turn over the full responsibility for whether the waves of life knocked me down or not, and not use any of my own cleverness to avoid things that are important, or my own strength to sustain them.  So the image he gave me, and he takes me back to it periodically over the years, was to simply stand there in the surf of life, facing forward and not sideways, letting come what may come, being willing to get knocked down by the waves, leaving all that in my loving Shepherd’s tender care.  Oh, that I would stay there.
Ps. 51:6 – and I like NASB here – “Behold, You desire truth in the innermost being, And in the hidden part You will make me know wisdom.”

I believe that ruthless honesty you speak to is so important, so that what remains is only what comes from him, and is sustained only by him.

I too find myself wondering what my life is about these days.  I sense I’m in some kind of in-between place.  I guess I used to have answers but don’t anymore, but either way, I wasn’t even asking the questions I now have.  And the questions I have now are more simple and fundamental.  Like, “okay, what now?”  And somehow, this seems good and right – thank you, Lord.  I take comfort in feeling small in this season, letting him be huge, wise, and in control.
Your friend,
Page
Categories
just thoughts

a call to war

I laid awake in the middle of a night recently, right after a gathering of our home church gang, stirred up by some challenging spiritual things several of us sensed were in our midst that night.

It brought me back to being mindful that we are in a war. There is an enemy and he is crafty. I’m aware that God, amazingly, has made us warriors of this battle, the ground on which this battle is fought, and the prize for which it is fought. Of course, we know Jesus has won the war, but that doesn’t keep many battles along the way from being yet undecided. And at any moment, there are some that look like we’re on the winning side, and others where it’s not looking so good.

Battles for the kingdom of God to move through us. Battles for our own personal victories as the saints walking in the authority of Christ, rising up in all that he has called each one of us to. Battles for our children to chose wisely how they will live their lives. Battles won as, by his grace, we press in to the presence of the Lord in our daily lives.

Pressing in by making ourselves available to his loving overtures. Pressing in to knowing ALL the truth as he so willingly discloses it to us by his word and Spirit. Pressing in to all of his heavenly blessings, which are our inheritance. Pressing in to his presence as worship warriors. Pressing in to our authority in prayer. Fighting this war on our knees.

I’m feeling a call to go to battle for the kingdom of God in and through us. To pray over all that God is doing in each of our families and marriages. To pray for what God is doing in this area, our domain of work/friends/neighbors/others in which we mostly live our lves. And to pray over what he’s doing in the world at large. And to break through barriers in our relationships, so that we are reaching the places that God is wanting to take us. I’m not wanting to fabricate anything that isn’t what God is doing, but only do what he’s doing. But wanting to see strongholds of the enemy broken that keep us from living stronger lives of worship, prayer, the gifts of the Spirit, seeing his Kingdom moving in the lives of others – getting free from lies that hold us back from living in his freedom, grace, love, mercy. Seeing this same reality of God spread to those around us, our families, etc. as he prompts us to give it away.

I laid awake for hours that night a few weeks ago, feeling stirred up, and called to war. I’m sure many of you have already been sensing this, and many have already been dwelling on various aspects of the battle and are in prayer about this. Bless you! I’m stirred up to pray, and ready to pray over these things in every setting we may find ourselves together.

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Categories
church journey

life begets life…

I had an email exchange with someone who asked:
Hi Page,

Can you tell me about the forms of discipleship that happen in simple church? I am looking for a community of faith that is intentional about discipleship–learning and growing as disciples of Christ and making new disciples…easier said than done.

My response:
Hi Friend,
My observation is that the thinking on discipleship is all over the map in simple/organic/home church groups just like it is in the traditional religious business church model. It’s been a particular interest of mine over the decades, so I can certainly understand your interest. There’s structured to unstructured. I see this as a matter of each of us working out with the Lord, and the body of believers we are with, how he is leading and following him on it (I guess that pretty much applies to any matter).

Someone else once said it, but I like it – there are times when we have a Paul in our life (an older brother, an elder for us), a Timothy (some one we can provide coaching/mentoring to), and a Barnabas (someone who comes along side and encourages). Not that you always have all happening at once, but as the Lord grants them, for he is the one, true, Discipler. I find that most of what happens in simple church life, where the kind of relationships are happening that he desires, is that he uses these relationships to disciple all of us at once, like iron sharpening iron. It’s the intentional living out our callings together over the years, as the body of Christ, where he shapes and molds us, often without us even knowing he’s doing it. And there are regular times of intentionally speaking into the lives of our brothers/sisters, as he gives the words of wisdom, knowledge, prophetic insight, etc. And all of this happens best in the context of the natural flow of trusting relationships. Our experience is that this kind of relationship are much easier to find over time in the context of simple/organic church life than the business model.

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church journey

the oil and vinegar of business and relationships

I’ve been talking with friends again about the hurtful things many have experienced at traditional business-like church organizations. There’s many common themes to it, but perhaps most of them can be categorized as “violation of relationship.” By that I mean that people do things to one another that violate the way relationships are to operate among followers of Jesus. This causes hurt, sometimes deeply, depending on the nature of the violation.

But here’s what I’ve come to believe: it all makes sense when we realize that there’s much more going on in the traditional business-like church organization than being followers of Jesus. I’ve come to see these traditional churches as essentially religious businesses that try to promote the Kingdom of God among it’s members and the community it considers it’s domain. And indeed, there are many wonderful things happening at these places, and there would be a huge void if suddenly they did not exist. I spent over two decades of my life laboring with others to start and expand these religious businesses, and quite successfully in terms of the common measures used. Yet I’ve also walked away in tears from more than one, confused about how/why the relationship violations occurred with me ending up with the short end of the stick. And I’m pretty sure I was on the “relationship violator” end of things more times than I know.

As much as we fantasize otherwise, I believe most religious businesses are businesses first, and doers of God-stuff second, because “Job 1 is to remain a viable business.” There’s government requirements for 501(c)3 “not-for-profit” business (huh? of COURSE they’re making a profit! But that’s a different conversation…), such as roles of president, vp, secretary, treasurer, by-laws, board meetings, blah blah. There’s people depending on their financial livelihood at this business. There’s mortages and utilities to pay, sound equipment and sunday school supplies to purchase. But all this stuff is earthly domain, man’s business, and has nothing to do with being the church that follows Jesus. Most participants probably don’t think of it this way, and rather think of it as “Job 1 is to remain a viable presence of the church.” It was true for me, because like many, the religious business model is what I believed WAS the church that Jesus intended. I didn’t know any better. And within that business model, there are also people’s career identities at stake. Now those are some strong forces.

Clearly there is massive blindness about this, and most people at these religious businesses have good intentions, and have no idea that what they are doing is not what Jesus intended for his church. It was true of me as well. Wearing unintended blinders, we don’t even see the plain spoken truths about this in the bible. But for many in our day the blinders are coming off.

My main point in this post is to say that, as heartless as it may sound, I believe that its pointless to complain about these violations of relationships that happen at these religious businesses. There HAS to be a hiearchical leadership, that HAS to establish direction and boundaries for the business, and that HAS to exert authority over the “members.” This is how business works. Business is man’s domain; and man must lead it or it will fall apart. It’s the same with any business. If an employee does things that threaten the vision/plans/success of their employer’s business, no one is surprised when such a person is reprimanded, or even fired, right? It wouldn’t matter that they had friends who worked there. At the end of the day, the leadership has to do what’s right for the business or its viability will be threatened. And the kicker is, I believe that’s how God intended business (not his church) to work. God put it in us to work (Genesis – Adam, the garden) and better our lives if we can (1Cor 7:21) and to enjoy the rewards of our labors (Eccl 5:18-20).

Mixing Kingdom-of-God intentions into earthly business is where it gets all messed up, especially if people start believing that God is the leader of it instead of man. Nope, God doesn’t take charge of our businesses. He gave Adam and Eve the charge of taking care of the garden, the earthly domain.

But when it comes to being the church that follows Jesus – now THAT’s where God is in charge, whether man acknowledges it or not, and where relationships are to operate much differently than they do at an earthly business. For example, Lording over is “illegal” in the church that follows Jesus (Matt 20:25-26), and calling people by special names that put them above others, like “father” or “pastor” or “reverend,” is against Jesus’ commands (Matt 23:8-10).

I’ve come to believe that if we are experiencing the common relationship violations that happen in religious businesses, we really have no one to blame but ourselves. Man’s vision and scope for a business will always be very small compared to God’s vision and scope for his church. So there will always be times when people have grown into as much of God’s kingdom as a particular religious business can support, and to get beyond that the people will be drawn into things outside the scope of where the leadership is comfortable, or able to lead. If the leadership feel that the business or their authority (which again, the business needs) is at risk by the actions of certain people, they will have to do things to resolve this conflict, and proper human relating as God intended among his followers will suffer, because that is not the priority in the business context. We should not expect otherwise.

For those who find themselves in that situation, the good news is that God is taking many into a new journey of being and finding the church that wants to follow Jesus alone, and that wants no part of mixing it with the business aspirations of man.

I love this verse from Hosea 6:3:
“So let us know, let us press on to know the LORD.
His going forth is as certain as the dawn;
And He will come to us like the rain,
Like the spring rain watering the earth.”

Categories
church journey

peace for the bride

<Note: this is a continuation of the thought/email mentioned in this post from a few days ago.>

I love Psalm 122.  It’s one that I put to music many years ago and I love to sing it still. 

It’s clear from Genesis to Revelation that God’s passion is for his bride, the new Jerusalem mentioned in the book of Revelation.  Every time I pray for peace among the bride of Christ, I’m praying for the peace of this Jerusalem.  Every labor I put into bringing about the peace he desires for his bride, I’m laboring for the peace of this Jerusalem.  This kind of activity has been a primary focus of my life for about 35 years.

Jesus made it clear that it’s never been about the physical descendants of Abraham, which are an earthly body of people.  The children of Abraham/Isaac/Jacob were all about his plan for bringing salvation to the entire human race, his highest creation, the descendants of Adam and Eve.  Jesus was about his bride, which is a spiritual or heavenly body.  Placing one section of humans on a pedestal above others is sinful, like idolatry.  And I say we should beware the blindness that thinks the current, earthly nation of Israel “can do no wrong.”  That group of people is made up of the same “stuff” that every other group on earth are made up of – human beings with a sinful nature that need Jesus.

There is certainly lots of injustice done in the world, by every nation, against every nation, including lots done against Jews.  I am not attempting to make any comment on what to do about the conundrum of strife in the Middle East.  My point in this conversation is to say that I do not accept that the current, earthly nation of Israel, and the earthly city of Jerusalem, is the same “Israel” and “Jerusalem” spoken of prophetically in scripture, which I believe is focused on the spiritual bride of Christ.

Thus, I do not see David’s prayer in Psalm 122, “may they prosper who love you <Jerusalem>” (NAS) as involving any kind of promise from God that he will prosper those who love the current, earthly nation of Israel.  This also means that I am not confident that the forming of the earthly nation of Israel in 1948 was a fulfillment of biblical prophesy or in any way connected to the promises of Christ’s return.  I am not aware of any place in scripture where we are encouraged to go about trying to fulfill prophecy, but I see this in some of the thinking of the church, especially with regard to “end times” and the current, earthly nation of Israel.  Jesus specifically taught against such thinking in Acts 1 when the disciples wanted to see him restore the nation of Israel even then, and he essentially said, “it’s not for you to know these things” and he focused them on following the lead of the Holy Spirit.  In my humble view, this is where we as his church need to keep our focus still.